Tuesday, October 11, 2011

Hey Ladies... where have all the "Real Men" gone?

     So, I was talking with some ladies recently (or rather they were talking at Mach 3 and I was listening) and their conversation veered toward "real men", or in their opinion, the lack thereof! Wait....WTF?!?!?

Of course, I had to chime in and say "hold on a second! What the f$%k am I? chopped liver?" 

"No, not you! We mean there aren't any younger real men". 

Hmmm.This got me thinking (see picture of me thinking...)

Apparently we have lost the ability to make "real men" out of men along the way. Sometime in the late 80's we lost this skill and it has been disastrous ever since. I must admit... I am amused. This is worse than the case of the missing teaspoons!
     But really, how can they say there are no "real men" left? Present party included, I know plenty of "real men".  

Or do I?

     Maybe what "I" think makes a "real man" really doesn't. Maybe I have been thinking I am a real man all along when they think I am not. And what about all of those single guys that are walking around confused!! What if they don't know what makes a "real man"?  

This begs the question of what, in fact, according to women,  constitutes a "real man" ? 

And more importantly, where have they all gone? 

    I guess the only way to solve this is to put it to you Dear Readers, or more specifically, all of my Lady Dear Readers. This is your chance to vent your frustrations!
1) What constitutes a "Real Man". Be specific now...no waffling

2) Do you think there are any young "real men" out there? If not, why not?

I say we start with this and see where it goes. So what do you say ladies?
You lament that there are no "real men" our there? Help us out?
Leave some comments!

Friday, September 30, 2011

Generation No-Patience... and how to have fun with them.

What is taking sooooo looooooong!
     For all you parents out there trying to teach your young kids patience… you have an uphill battle. In this age of instant gratification, a few seconds is a lifetime to this generation and I think I finally found the icon that taps into their deepest fears. It is a powerful icon, harmless to us adults, but to this generation it spells utter doom, or a close approximation thereof, to them which is…

Waiting. 

You laugh, but I have seen the effects of this pernicious activity on my kids and others, but fear not! We can learn to harness this power for our own amusement. If you want to know what icon will have your kids rolling on the floor in theatrics, read farther Dear Reader…

Thursday, September 1, 2011

One day walking tour of Paris

L'Arc de Triomphe
So I just took a trip to France for work and was able to spend some time in Paris,"The city of light". This was my first trip so I wanted to share my experiences with you dear readers.  Paris is definitely not the same experience (for those of you that have been to New York). It is not a gleaming maze of skyscrapers bur rather it is an Old World city so most of the buildings, which were made long before skyscrapers were around,  are no more than 8 or 10 stories tall and have stone facades with decorations, carvings, gargoyles etc. This alone gives the city a different, more charming feel about it. You KNOW you are in a big city walking through NY with its sky high buildings, but Paris has more of a village feel. I like it personally, but don’t be fooled. Paris has 9 million people and the prices to match so while it may not have that Modern city feel, you’re still not in Kansas anymore. I also observed a few more interesting things which I would like to share:
1) It is pretty easy to get around. The buses and metro are well marked inside and out and if you have a metro map and a city map with metro marks on it, you can easily navigate your way around. A one way fare costs only 1.70 euro or you can get a carnet (10 tickets) for less.
2) It is tres expensive here! This is a major tourist destination and they have the prices to show for it. You will find your usual $6 bottles of water and a dejeuner (lunch) in a tourist area is at least $30. If you go out for a fancy dinner be prepared to pay in excess of $50 per person easily!  Don’t say I didn’t warn you.
3) It was very clean. I was walking around in the morning and the city crews are out hard a work picking up trash, washing the sidewalks and keeping things spiffy. The French take pride in their city and know that tourism is a big industry so they keep it clean. Trash bins are located liberally throughout the city so there is really no excuse to litter. The only item that seems to escape this is the cigarette butts… but more about that next.
4) Everyone smokes. I mean nearly everyone. And they look good doing it too! There is something about the way a French person smokes that makes it more elegant. And they all do it (or it seems that way). Luckily they started to institute a ban on smoking in restaurants a few years ago but the outside venues are still fair game… so if you’re sitting at a brasserie in the Latin Quarter watching the people go by, there is a good chance your table neighbor will be puffing away. Lovely!
5) The women are beautiful and there are a ton of them. Everywhere you look you see some of the most beautiful woman on earth. Neck on a swivel doesn’t even describe it gents. On top of that the French gals are tough too. How do I know this? They jog without bras… who knew?
6) My French is very poor and of course I have an accent but saying “bonjour” and trying the few words you know seems to go a long way toward getting the service you need. I think that they appreciate people trying, even if they butcher it. They will talk back you in French for as long as you can hold out… and when you start to falter, graciously switch to English, which most of them can speak passably enough.  So even if you have to look at your notes; give it a try. The service will be better.
7) Many places charge you to use the bathroom! Really! It is only .50 euro but if you are in dire straits and head down to les toilettes only to find there is a fee and you don’t have any change… then you will really be in trouble! Always keep some .50 euro coins in your pocket for this … you never know when you’ll need it. There are exceptions though, as I explain in the next paragraph.
8) Paris has a nice Irish community and plenty of Irish pubs for you to visit. Some of the more famous are Corcoran’s and the Quiet Man where you can get your pint in the traditional pub atmosphere and don’t have to drink the crappy Heineken or 1664 local swill that they serve everywhere else. And on top of that… they don’t charge you to use the bathroom!! So if you need to go, walk into a pub, buy a beer, use the loo, come back and finish your beer at a leisurely pace. It will be worth it.
9) If you have kids, they can go too, but you may want to wait until they are a little older. The alure of Paris is the history which you can't really appreciate until you learn it. Wait until they are at least in middle school and have covered European history. You could just do the amusement parks and Euro disney... but then you would be missing the rich historical sights. 

Overall, if you have a chance to go and visit, I would highly recommend it. You could spend 2 days on a whirlwind tour of all of the big sites but this would be a lot of work (and walking!). Instead spend a week there looking at the site's and enjoying the scenery in a more leisurely pace. I intend to try that next time!


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Monday, May 30, 2011

- The BIG summer project - A new Deck!


Can you feel it? The Do-it-yourself ads are on every 2 minutes. Lawnmowers are firing up. Flowers are going in... yes spring is finally here and like most homeowners, spring is the time to consider those big projects for the summer season. Well after 4 years of waiting, the Dear Wife and I are finally starting on our Big Project - A brand new Deck!We will try to turn this into... 

well, you'll have to read on!









Tuesday, March 15, 2011

Bristol is getting a major facelift...

For all you Bristol natives, tell me if you had a similar experience.
     Growing up in Bristol was not glamorous. Friday nights in high school consisted of going to Muzzy to watch a football game and then we either went to a party(or held our own ;-] ) or we cruised the main roads (Rt6 or North Main) and drove through all the fast food joints to see who was out. We might go bowling at ten pin but what else was there to do? Not much. We couldn't gather together because the cops would always come and break us up.
     Turning 21 didn't change it all that much. We could go to a few of the local bars (none very nice looking) or we could go clubbing (only one in town but it was rough). There hasn't been a cinema in town for years (used to be next to the McD's on River Rd across from Barnes building) and there aren't any bookstores to just sit and read a coffee and chat, at least not the Borders/BnN variety anyway. If we wanted something really cool to do... we went somewhere else!
     Well that could change! If you aren't aware, the town has partnered with a firm called Renaissance, who has developed a preliminary plan to revitalize the downtown area. I'm not talking about just the North main street area, but actually the area from the King Street end of Memorial Boulevard up to the West end and from the Intersection of Rte 6 and North Main to South Street. They have done some really nice studies on this area and are in the process of finalizing that design. Their plan is to create what they call a 'mixed use' (meaning residential and commercial/retail) area centred at the site of the old Centre Mall.
     What does this have to do with you? You can get in on the discussion! They have set up a website called BristolRising which has the latest information on this effort. People can join the website and put up ideas for what they would like to see there. Then you can vote on which of the ideas you like the best and hopefully those get incorporated in the final plan. Of course I am not doing the whole thing justice but let me make the most important point here.
    For once, Bristolites have a chance to be part of an effort which could drastically alter the fabric of the town. This is the best effort I have seen ever and is also, I might add the best and most proper approach to fixing the towns aesthetic ills. Single issue, narrow focus efforts have been tried with varying degrees of success, but this takes a comprehensive, 50,000 foot view of the town and drafts a plan to address.
     I urge all of you that care for the town and it's future to visit the site and get involve in the action and the discussion. Let's stop talking about how much it sucks and actually do something about it! I have...I hope you will too.


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Monday, February 28, 2011

A meat eater in Delhi...

For all you beef loving Americans that are planning a trip to India, this is a warning tale. All seems fine as you walk through the airport  and see the familiar signs of American fast food domination; McDonald, Subway, Dominos, Kentucky fried chicken.... They're all there. But it is a ruse Dear Reader, because you're in for rude awakening. Let me tell what you're in for...









Monday, February 21, 2011

The Case of the Missing Tea Spoons

One of the last of it's kind...
     Stuff disappears. It’s a Law of the Universe right? Things just randomly disappear. Happens to everyone. Give you an example you say? Socks readily come to mind. I mean I don't doubt that there's a secret sock world which is only accessible through a special portal - the dryer. Scientists are still working on it but you get the point. Things disappear and believe it or not there are a set of unspoken rules that allow things to stay ‘disappeared’. I know, I know. It’s hard to believe but it’s true and I tell you, Dear Readers, that there is a disturbance in the force lately. Nearly all of our lovely teaspoons have gone missing and action needs to be taken! 


Monday, February 14, 2011

Best Decision I Made All Day...

    As happens a lot lately, after we put the girls to bed, they stay up for a little while and talk to each other, which I am OK with if it doesn't go on too long (30 minutes or so is not bad). After 20-30 minutes I will stop in and lightly tell them to go to sleep but caution them that the next time I come back I will be "mean". That usually does it, but tonight they were already on two such visits and I could still hear them talking away from my seat on the couch downstairs. Big Bang Theory was on so I didn't do anything... until I heard the pitter-patter of little feet on the floor and that did it. I climbed the stairs two at a time, my anger climbing up my throat with each step, ready to let out a vengeful "Go To Bed" roar! I was about to grab the handle and throw the door open, when for some reason I stopped and listened. I tell you Dear Readers, it was the best decision I made all day. 





Monday, February 7, 2011

Between the what? read here to find out what the F$%^ that means...

Any of you ever played jacks when you were a kid? You  know, the game with the little metal spikey things (see picture) and a super ball? Ringing any bells yet? Well for those of you that have, you know that it was pretty fun. My sister and I used to play jacks in the upstairs hallway when we were kids. It had nice hardwood floors so you could get a really good bounce. Of course the bounce went wild sometimes and headed off down the stairs, or the cat took off after it, but usually things went fine. I really liked playing that game with her and, if I may add, I usually kicked her butt (she will of course say otherwise!). Well I have a revelation for you. Jacks is like life... and if you give a few minutes, I can explain.